It's a Myth

Incredibly enough

I was told to read Daniel Quinn's “Ishmael” by a dear friend. He's not the kind of guy who tells people what to do, so when he recommends something, it grabs my attention.

"Ishmael" explores a dialogue between a captive gorilla and a man, dissecting human societal constructs. The novel offers a unique interpretation of human history from a gorilla’s perspective.

While I was reading, these words struck me profoundly:

"It’s a myth. Incredibly enough, it’s a myth."

My therapist brain was immediately activated.

I stopped reading and thought, "Is it all just a myth? This society we’ve created? The expectations thrust upon each of us?" Universally, the answer is yes. It's all just a myth, history comprised of stories and myths passed down through generations. Yet, we rarely stop to question why.

Why do we continue these myths? Shouldn’t we pause to consider if we want to keep believing them? If they are just myths, why cling to them so tightly? If we dislike the myth, why not create new ones?

Society often holds us back, and sometimes family does too. These myths are tough to escape. Yet, we must strive to control our individual myths. Ultimately, the only thing we truly control is who we believe ourselves to be.

Photo by Daniel Leone on Unsplash

As a therapist, I have the privilege to observe the myths people follow. I am invited to sit with them as they explore their most personal and vulnerable experiences.

They tell me the myths they follow, but seldom have they asked for these myths. Society imposes these myths through customs, traditions, and laws. While many of these customs are beneficial, others are not.

This is why the question, 'If you were given a year to live, how would you change your life?' is so compelling. In that moment, you would certainly abandon the myths that weren't serving you.

Confronted with the finality of death, we break free from our habitual patterns, from the myths. We immediately create new myths. Why wouldn't we? With only a year to live, who cares about the old myths? Most of these myths aren’t serving our true selves anyway.

What if you could create a new myth, free from psychological limitations and fears? You would live your life fully, pursue happiness without restraint, and be driven by a profound sense of purpose. You would seek to love and be loved.

You would discard the old myth instantly, recognizing it serves no purpose. Without a second thought, you would cast it aside.

So why not choose to discard the myths that are not serving you? One reason might be that you have nothing to replace them with. You haven’t yet established a new myth; you would simply be left without one.

We each need to create a new myth for ourselves, one with fewer obstacles. It involves replacing parts of our myths that hold us back; those written by others and those that defined us without our knowledge or consent.

And no, we don't need to discard everything. Many parts of your myth work tremendously well. Tradition and history can be wonderful, loving, and instructional. Consider your compassion for others, your sense of enlightenment, and your self-awareness. These are myths worth keeping.

However, you might want to rewrite a portion of your myth to create an intentional life with an intentional myth.

Photo by Paul Earle on Unsplash

Here are some questions I use to ensure I'm living an intentional life:

• What myths do you hold that detract from who you aspire to become?

• Who wrote, or helped you write, these myths?

• Which parts of the myth would you keep? Which would you discard?

• If you had only one month to live, would you continue living by this myth?

Let me answer that last question for you. No, you would discard this myth so quickly. You would ignore it and never listen to it again.

And then, you would create a new myth.

I know, the idea of only having a year to live might seem drastic, a cliché even. But what's truly drastic is the timeframe I've allotted. Replace one year with ten years, or twenty-five years. Does it change the urgency?

We must remember that our time is finite. While we comfort ourselves with the concept of 'average life expectancy,' the truth is we don't know how long we have in this world.

But we can't just discard the old myths; we need to replace them. Otherwise, a vacuum forms, and the old myths inevitably creep back in.

So, create a new myth. One free from psychological barriers. No fears. No shame. No judgments. Just kindness toward yourself and others.

Live intentionally, pursuing happiness and joy.

Knowing you have the power to write your own myth.